If you want to annoy and unsettle new parents - or if you just want to underscore the fact that you have never had a baby - then you should go ahead and ask them that most inane of questions.... "Does your baby sleep through the night?"
Or if you want to annoy not-so-new parents of a 15 month-old, then go ahead and ask me and my husband, "Does he sleep through the night yet?"
Ha. Ha. Ha.
"No, thanks for asking! No, he absolutely does not."
At the moment, baby G goes into his crib around 7:30, and takes about a half hour to fall asleep. (Parental units must be present cribside, preferably touching his back and playing relaxing music, for this to happen.) Depending on whether or not he is teething (he seems these days to be constantly teething), he wakes up anywhere from an hour to three hours after falling asleep. Thereupon he wakes up every hour until he is taken into bed with parental units. Which is usually after the first waking, because, come on, who are we kidding? I like and NEED my sleep, and I get the most when baby G is in my bed.
The thing to understand about baby sleep is this. That sleep like a baby thing? Hm yah, most bedeviled saying ever invented, perhaps invented by the devil himself as a way to trick unsuspecting couples into thinking that babies are easy and no they shouldn't worry about condoms. Babies are not easy, and babies do not "sleep like a baby."
This is how baby sleep goes:
You get home from the hospital with an impossibly tiny, delicate, most-beautiful creature - your newborn baby. Baby sleeps!You think, oh this isn't so bad.
After baby has rested from the trauma of birth, he needs to eat! He eats constantly, throughout the night. It is UNSAFE for baby to go longer than 3 hours without eating because his tummy is the size of walnut. Therefore, even if he does manage to sleep a stretch, you are waking every hour to vouchsafe his continued existence. You are more sleep-deprived then the time you pulled two all-nighters in college.
After three months baby may have started to "sleep through the night." I mean that in the clinical sense of the phrase, which is sleeping for five hours straight. This seems like bliss.
Then baby hits the 3-month growth phrase, where - literally - they can grow an inch OVER NIGHT. (Not joking.) They wake up EVERY HOUR demanding to be feed. Your sanity is hanging perilously over the edge of a cliff.
At 6 months your baby is old enough to try more drastic (to me cruel) measures of "sleep training." Cry-it-out (in it's most extreme and mean form) is where you say good-night to your baby in its crib and don't go in the room again until morning, no matter what! I label this as cruel and unusual punishment. There are more moderate versions of this that may be better, but let's just leave it at that for now. I'll do a full critique on sleep training later. For us, at 6 months, I started reading baby sleep books and continued napping when baby G did in the afternoon.
At 7 months baby G was sleeping with us but only waking once to feed.
At 9 months, baby G realized that he and his mommy were separate beings, and that I <shocking!> could LEAVE him. Otherwise known as separation anxiety, it is obviously an important and necessary mental milestone, but OMG, sleep regression is not even the word for it. He was waking EVERY hour to make sure I was still there. I felt like I was sleeping with a newborn again - and looked like it too. (By the way, at the time, I didn't realize why he was waking. I thought it might be teething or a virus. It was only a few months later when I was reading about separation anxiety that I had that AHA! moment.)
At a year, baby G was waking about twice or thrice a night. Mommy's all-night open milk bar being the arousal cue. (Hey, if I had a warm container of hot chocolate sleeping next to me all night, I think I would wake a few times to take a sip too.)
At 13 months I tried to night-wean, and it was just too soon. And too much crying. And bah, I just couldn't be bothered.
Now, at 15 months, last night we had a break-through! I told him when putting him to bed that mommy's milk was going to be sleeping tonight and he would have to wait until the morning. I didn't nurse him once all night long. Was he super-pissed??? Oh hell yes. He screamed and screamed and was a right little tyrant. But he didn't get his way and he eventually went to sleep. (Although he did do lots of headbashing, as he would dive-bomb his little head towards my chest and end up hitting my head instead. Would have been amusing if it weren't at 1am, 2am, and 4am.) I think it will take a few nights and then he'll be accustomed.
I'm hoping to have him out of our bed by his second birthday - mostly to make room for a possible sibling more than anything else. I love sleeping next to my little snuggle puppy. I think the most important things to remember when you think you're going crazy with lack of sleep is to:
1) follow your gut, not what some "sleep expert" says, it is your baby and only you can really know what is best for your family
and
2) remember that your baby will be sleeping through the night by age four at least - that may seem like an eternity of sleep-deprivation but instead of seeing the negative, treasure their little-baby-ness - it is so fleeting! When they are a teenager and sleeping till noon, you will remember baby sleep fondly.
That last point brings me to co-sleeping. Which I also will do a whole seperate post on, but just now to say, if you end up co-sleeping - embrace it! Even my husband who was SO against it at first, and even now is only a tolerant practicer - says that waking up to baby G's smile is the "best feeling in the world."
Monday, April 1, 2013
Wednesday, March 20, 2013
Happy 15-month birthday baby Gage
Dear Gage,
At 15 months you are still the happiest of babies. You laugh and smile all the time! You still also babble up a storm, now complete with elaborate hand and shoulder gestures. We know when you are saying: mama, daddy, dog, cat, duck, tea, shoes, bye, owl..... But everything else is still in baby code. You also do the signs for "light", "milk", and "home." (and you made up your own sign for "butterfly.")
You know how to wave bye-bye (although you prefer to wave bye-bye to cars trains and buses), how to high-five, how to cheers, how to dance (you are an amazing dancer!), and how to run (almost). You love to push things around. Especially your toy stroller and toy shopping cart - plus other kids' scooters at the playground!
Your favorite sound to dance to is the song "Mykonos" by Fleet Foxes and the noise of the washing machine. I carry you around on my shoulders in the house when you are bored but not ready to go outside yet - you are easy to entertain and that is a good thing! Your favorite book is Little Blue Truck in the city; I read it to you at least three times a day and then go to bed reciting the words in my head.
You love dogs and whenever you see a dog, or a picture of a dog, or even something that even remotely resembles a dog, you point and say "dog! dog!" you are gentle with other babies and your favorite playmates are Charlotte and Sebastian. You still are not the best sleeper and you still sleep in our bed but we don't mind. You are our little snuggle puppy.
You are really not a baby anymore - you are a toddler with an opinion, an engaging personality and infectious smile. But you will always be my sweet baby Gage. I can't believe how fast the past 15 months have gone and I can't wait to see what you have in store for your daddy and me over the next few months (and years!)
Love,
Mommy
At 15 months you are still the happiest of babies. You laugh and smile all the time! You still also babble up a storm, now complete with elaborate hand and shoulder gestures. We know when you are saying: mama, daddy, dog, cat, duck, tea, shoes, bye, owl..... But everything else is still in baby code. You also do the signs for "light", "milk", and "home." (and you made up your own sign for "butterfly.")
You know how to wave bye-bye (although you prefer to wave bye-bye to cars trains and buses), how to high-five, how to cheers, how to dance (you are an amazing dancer!), and how to run (almost). You love to push things around. Especially your toy stroller and toy shopping cart - plus other kids' scooters at the playground!
Your favorite sound to dance to is the song "Mykonos" by Fleet Foxes and the noise of the washing machine. I carry you around on my shoulders in the house when you are bored but not ready to go outside yet - you are easy to entertain and that is a good thing! Your favorite book is Little Blue Truck in the city; I read it to you at least three times a day and then go to bed reciting the words in my head.
You love dogs and whenever you see a dog, or a picture of a dog, or even something that even remotely resembles a dog, you point and say "dog! dog!" you are gentle with other babies and your favorite playmates are Charlotte and Sebastian. You still are not the best sleeper and you still sleep in our bed but we don't mind. You are our little snuggle puppy.
You are really not a baby anymore - you are a toddler with an opinion, an engaging personality and infectious smile. But you will always be my sweet baby Gage. I can't believe how fast the past 15 months have gone and I can't wait to see what you have in store for your daddy and me over the next few months (and years!)
Love,
Mommy
Sunday, January 20, 2013
Baby books
Since a few friends and acquaintances are currently preggo, and since I am just now starting to find the idea of being pregnant again slightly palatable, I thought I'd do a quick list of the books that have been most helpful to me over the past year. I know I've done a book list before, but that was a shot in the dark. The ones listed below are tried & tested winners.
The MUST-Reads
The Happiest Baby on the Block - I've sung this books praises before, buy it and read it well before you deliver!
The No-Cry Sleep Solution - I have yet to do the post on baby sleep that I keep telling myself I must do, but let me just say that this book has been so helpful to me so many times. Every other sleep book out there will espouse some version of crying it out. (Hello, It works! But at what psychological cost?) And, if you missed my facebook posts about it, or were fortunate enough to not have been privy to some opinion-blasting group emails, then you'll know that I am NOT a fan of letting your baby cry alone in a dark room. Particularly before 6 months of age, but really, not ever. Pantley is not a fan either and she has some practical, sound alternative advice.
Welcome to Your Child's Brain - This is a good one to read during the early month's hour-long breastfeeding sessions. It is so interesting and so refreshing to read because - unlike other books which blast you with unsubstantiated opinion - it offers scientific fact from which you can reach your own opinions.
What to Expect the First Year - A good basic reference book which I would check each month to see how baby boy compared to the "norm." I also received (and still receive) the daily emails from whattoexpect.com - which I highly recommend - but the book goes into more depth and is worth having.
And last, but certainly not least,
Baby Led Weaning and the Baby Led Weaning Cookbook - I can't remember who told me about baby led weaning for the first time but I cannot thank them enough. I had been all set to make my own purees, buy a fancy baby blender, and spoon feed my baby. And then I learned about BLW (weaning means introduction of solid food in British English) and I was intrigued. When baby boy starting showing an interest in food, and reaching for it himself (at about 5 and a half months old), I just let him have a go of it himself. And it has been one of the best decisions I have made. While he isn't always a champion eater (he is most of the time), and he goes through phases (like all babies), he DOES have the most amazing array of food preferences, and he can CHEW like nobody's business. Letting them only have solid food from the get-go means they actually learn to chew, and baby boy has been gumming down tough meats from 7 months! We went to sushi when he was 9 months old and the entire waitstaff was in awe of him as he sat gobbling down his california roll. Sure, it's messy, especially at the beginning, but so - apparently - are purees. For a good overview of weaning go here, and even if you're not convinced about the BLW thing, buy the cookbook. It has great recipes for babies and toddlers, and some really good ideas about how to make easy, varied breakfasts and lunches.
That's about all for now. This past year has gone by so fast. I'm off to go order What to Expect The Second Year.... and will let you know how it is ;)
The MUST-Reads
The Happiest Baby on the Block - I've sung this books praises before, buy it and read it well before you deliver!
The No-Cry Sleep Solution - I have yet to do the post on baby sleep that I keep telling myself I must do, but let me just say that this book has been so helpful to me so many times. Every other sleep book out there will espouse some version of crying it out. (Hello, It works! But at what psychological cost?) And, if you missed my facebook posts about it, or were fortunate enough to not have been privy to some opinion-blasting group emails, then you'll know that I am NOT a fan of letting your baby cry alone in a dark room. Particularly before 6 months of age, but really, not ever. Pantley is not a fan either and she has some practical, sound alternative advice.
Welcome to Your Child's Brain - This is a good one to read during the early month's hour-long breastfeeding sessions. It is so interesting and so refreshing to read because - unlike other books which blast you with unsubstantiated opinion - it offers scientific fact from which you can reach your own opinions.
What to Expect the First Year - A good basic reference book which I would check each month to see how baby boy compared to the "norm." I also received (and still receive) the daily emails from whattoexpect.com - which I highly recommend - but the book goes into more depth and is worth having.
And last, but certainly not least,
Baby Led Weaning and the Baby Led Weaning Cookbook - I can't remember who told me about baby led weaning for the first time but I cannot thank them enough. I had been all set to make my own purees, buy a fancy baby blender, and spoon feed my baby. And then I learned about BLW (weaning means introduction of solid food in British English) and I was intrigued. When baby boy starting showing an interest in food, and reaching for it himself (at about 5 and a half months old), I just let him have a go of it himself. And it has been one of the best decisions I have made. While he isn't always a champion eater (he is most of the time), and he goes through phases (like all babies), he DOES have the most amazing array of food preferences, and he can CHEW like nobody's business. Letting them only have solid food from the get-go means they actually learn to chew, and baby boy has been gumming down tough meats from 7 months! We went to sushi when he was 9 months old and the entire waitstaff was in awe of him as he sat gobbling down his california roll. Sure, it's messy, especially at the beginning, but so - apparently - are purees. For a good overview of weaning go here, and even if you're not convinced about the BLW thing, buy the cookbook. It has great recipes for babies and toddlers, and some really good ideas about how to make easy, varied breakfasts and lunches.
That's about all for now. This past year has gone by so fast. I'm off to go order What to Expect The Second Year.... and will let you know how it is ;)
Wednesday, August 8, 2012
Newborns are TOUGH
At about six weeks postpartum, I had missed an important deadline for the HWC newsletter. I wrote a short email on my ipad (while breastfeeding) explaining that I had just given birth a few weeks ago and sorry for the delay. The woman responded immediately, saying it wasn't a problem and, "good luck, newborns are tough!"
At the time I was very grateful for her understanding, and that, having three much older children, she remembered just how tough it is/was. Because it is easy to forget how hard those first three months were. Now, at 7 months, Gage is a cheerful, smiley, happy, easy-going bubs, who only whines when he's over-tired, sick, or has a poopy diaper. (Hey, I would whine too.) It's easy to forget that he spent a lot of his first three months of life - when awake and not feeding - crying. Yes, my happy go-lucky baby boy cried a lot. And even if you manage to give birth to an "easy" newborn, the toll of night-wakings, constant feedings, and constant attention do take their toll.
I remember thinking when I was pregnant - "bah, this whole waking every 3 hour thing during the night to feed - I can do this! I'll just sleep during the day when baby is napping!" Well sister, let me tell you, you just do NOT realize how important it is to have more than 3 hours of continuous sleep at night. I don't know rightly how to describe it except that there is no other point in my life where I have been as sleep-deprived. In college, or when working a very demanding job/jobs ( there was a point in my life where I was working 100 hour weeks), I still got to go home and sleep for at least 5 hours, uninterrupted, and then made it through the day with lots of caffeine. With a newborn baby you NEVER get more than 5 hours uninterrupted - in fact it's dangerous if they do go that long because their little tummies (smaller than a walnut at birth) can't take in enough milk to last them that long!) Also, you can't have caffeine when your baby is this young (caffeine in a newborn has a half-life of almost 90 days!!!)
Just to give you an idea of what days (and nights) with a newborn are like, here is a snapshot - taken from my handy breastfeeding app (which I wouldn't have survived without.)
Gage's feeding times on Friday January 20th 2012 (four weeks old):
1:00 am - 1:35 am
4:14 am - 4:20 am
5:12 am - 5:16 am
5:33 am - 6:45 am
7:35 am - 7:45 am
10:07 am - 10:22 am
10:30 am - 11:52 am
12:16 pm - 1:13 pm
2:40 pm - 3:49 pm
4:30 pm - 5:05 pm
8:15 pm - 9:10 pm
9:28 pm - 9:50 pm
(Saturday)
1:17 am - 1:30 am
OMG I feel exhausted just reading the above. In case you fail to recognize the significance of the time table above.... at NO POINT in that 24 hour period did baby Gage go longer than 3 hours without eating, and in fact, he only gave me ONE stretch of 3 hours, and he did several HOUR LONG feedings. Yes, my pregnant, and soon to be maybe one day pregnant friends, please queue up some movies and TV shows on your ipad - you will not be cognizant enough for any serious reading, but you won't be able to sleep with baby on your boob either!
As time progresses it gets gradually better...
By 8 weeks he was waking up to eat at 1am, 3am, and 5am (going to bed at 9pm and waking up for the day at 7am - not that there is really a huge difference at that age beween night and day! but still he did know that nighttime was for sleeping, not playing, which is more than can be said for some of my unlucky friends' babies!) This 3x a night waking was totally do-able. I was still walking around like a heavy-lidded zombie most days, but at least I managed to get out of my pjs and make a trip to the grocery store or go to the cafe to meet friends (not both in the same day though!)
And then, at 3 months, he had a major growth spurt and he was waking up EVERY HOUR to eat. So, like any reasonable person who wants to get a maximum of sleep and keep insanity at bay, I just brought him to bed with me. He could eat as much as he wanted all night long, and I could sleep through most of it. Win, win. Except now we're trying to get him out of the bed so.... maybe not. But seriously don't know how I could have done it any other way!
I got kinda sidetracked there on the co-sleeping issue - which I will most definitely have to write more about - but the moral of the story is NEWBORNS ARE SO TOUGH!
Add to the constant eating, the constant poo-ing that goes with it (12 diapers in one day being about the norm - and night-time diaper changes too), oh and the CRYING, oh and then on your end the continuous bleeding, the still-looking-like-you're-7-months-pregnant for the first MONTH or so post-partum, and yah, it all adds up to some FUN. TIMES.
Forgive the sarcasm, but I like to hammer home a point.
And to end this post on a positive note, I'd like to add that, one of the reasons it's so hard caring for a newborn is because you care SO much about this new little being whom you have brought into this world - you would do anything on earth for them - and it is so overwhelming, and wonderful, and beautiful, but, like anything worth doing, it is a challenge.
At the time I was very grateful for her understanding, and that, having three much older children, she remembered just how tough it is/was. Because it is easy to forget how hard those first three months were. Now, at 7 months, Gage is a cheerful, smiley, happy, easy-going bubs, who only whines when he's over-tired, sick, or has a poopy diaper. (Hey, I would whine too.) It's easy to forget that he spent a lot of his first three months of life - when awake and not feeding - crying. Yes, my happy go-lucky baby boy cried a lot. And even if you manage to give birth to an "easy" newborn, the toll of night-wakings, constant feedings, and constant attention do take their toll.
I remember thinking when I was pregnant - "bah, this whole waking every 3 hour thing during the night to feed - I can do this! I'll just sleep during the day when baby is napping!" Well sister, let me tell you, you just do NOT realize how important it is to have more than 3 hours of continuous sleep at night. I don't know rightly how to describe it except that there is no other point in my life where I have been as sleep-deprived. In college, or when working a very demanding job/jobs ( there was a point in my life where I was working 100 hour weeks), I still got to go home and sleep for at least 5 hours, uninterrupted, and then made it through the day with lots of caffeine. With a newborn baby you NEVER get more than 5 hours uninterrupted - in fact it's dangerous if they do go that long because their little tummies (smaller than a walnut at birth) can't take in enough milk to last them that long!) Also, you can't have caffeine when your baby is this young (caffeine in a newborn has a half-life of almost 90 days!!!)
Just to give you an idea of what days (and nights) with a newborn are like, here is a snapshot - taken from my handy breastfeeding app (which I wouldn't have survived without.)
Gage's feeding times on Friday January 20th 2012 (four weeks old):
1:00 am - 1:35 am
4:14 am - 4:20 am
5:12 am - 5:16 am
5:33 am - 6:45 am
7:35 am - 7:45 am
10:07 am - 10:22 am
10:30 am - 11:52 am
12:16 pm - 1:13 pm
2:40 pm - 3:49 pm
4:30 pm - 5:05 pm
8:15 pm - 9:10 pm
9:28 pm - 9:50 pm
(Saturday)
1:17 am - 1:30 am
OMG I feel exhausted just reading the above. In case you fail to recognize the significance of the time table above.... at NO POINT in that 24 hour period did baby Gage go longer than 3 hours without eating, and in fact, he only gave me ONE stretch of 3 hours, and he did several HOUR LONG feedings. Yes, my pregnant, and soon to be maybe one day pregnant friends, please queue up some movies and TV shows on your ipad - you will not be cognizant enough for any serious reading, but you won't be able to sleep with baby on your boob either!
 |
| Baby Gage at 4 weeks, screaming his head off after a bath |
As time progresses it gets gradually better...
By 8 weeks he was waking up to eat at 1am, 3am, and 5am (going to bed at 9pm and waking up for the day at 7am - not that there is really a huge difference at that age beween night and day! but still he did know that nighttime was for sleeping, not playing, which is more than can be said for some of my unlucky friends' babies!) This 3x a night waking was totally do-able. I was still walking around like a heavy-lidded zombie most days, but at least I managed to get out of my pjs and make a trip to the grocery store or go to the cafe to meet friends (not both in the same day though!)
And then, at 3 months, he had a major growth spurt and he was waking up EVERY HOUR to eat. So, like any reasonable person who wants to get a maximum of sleep and keep insanity at bay, I just brought him to bed with me. He could eat as much as he wanted all night long, and I could sleep through most of it. Win, win. Except now we're trying to get him out of the bed so.... maybe not. But seriously don't know how I could have done it any other way!
I got kinda sidetracked there on the co-sleeping issue - which I will most definitely have to write more about - but the moral of the story is NEWBORNS ARE SO TOUGH!
Add to the constant eating, the constant poo-ing that goes with it (12 diapers in one day being about the norm - and night-time diaper changes too), oh and the CRYING, oh and then on your end the continuous bleeding, the still-looking-like-you're-7-months-pregnant for the first MONTH or so post-partum, and yah, it all adds up to some FUN. TIMES.
Forgive the sarcasm, but I like to hammer home a point.
And to end this post on a positive note, I'd like to add that, one of the reasons it's so hard caring for a newborn is because you care SO much about this new little being whom you have brought into this world - you would do anything on earth for them - and it is so overwhelming, and wonderful, and beautiful, but, like anything worth doing, it is a challenge.
 |
| My sleeping angel 11 days old |
Tuesday, July 10, 2012
Baby Led Weaning - the beginnings
In four weeks of "weaning" (in British English this means the introduction of solid foods - NOT the reduction/elimination of breastmilk/formula), Gage has had (roughly in order of appearance on his tray):
- nectarine*
- mango
- yogurt
- papaya
- reduced-sugar rusks (a wheat/cornmeal dry biscuit thing)
- whole wheat toast
- carrot*
- parsnip*
- broccoli*
- avocado
- banana
- apple
- lamb shank*
- oatmeal
- asparagus*
- beets
- stir-fried beef
- noodles
- salmon*
- cheese
- home-made beef meatballs*
- peppers
- zucchini
- chicken breast
- tomato
- sardines
- apricot*
- pear
Some things he definitely didn't like. Yogurt, pear and oatmeal in particular. Some things - the ones with stars - he LOVES. He is for sure a carnivore.
On Sunday we went out for brunch/lunch. I had zucchini fritters with avocado and Chris had a chicken sandwich (made with freshly cooked, still warm chicken.) Gage had slices of avocado from my salad and a chunk of chicken and a slice of tomato from Chris' sandwich. He loved everything. He did ruin a cute pair of baby blue pants though by dropping huge chunks of avocado on them (avocado is a bit slippery and hard for him to handle) - but it was so fun to watch him. He clearly knows he's participating in the family meal.
It's also fun watching how he progresses. He's kind of figured out how to get at stuff that's in his fists... kinda. This morning he had lemon ricotta pancakes (Dad's birthday is a special day). He liked the apricot better though! And then we know he's done because he takes the food in his fist, holds it over the edge of the highchair... and let's it drop. Bye-bye food. I'm finished with you! And then we give him his cup of water, he takes a few sips, then tries to eat the cup, then spills the water, then tries to suck the water off the highchair tray. Haha. We should really get a video of this!
I am just loving baby-led weaning though. No stupid purees! He wouldn't let me spoon-fed him even if I tried. When I do try to put a spoon of something to his mouth, he purses his lips shut. (If I give him the spoon to feed himself, he will get it in his mouth - usually upside down though.) To watch him progress day by day in his ability to pick up food, get it to his mouth, and figure out how to chew and swallow - well it's just so fun! Like watching him try to figure out how to crawl. Except more enjoyable for everyone.
(Do you want to know how I know he is actually swallowing more and more food every day? Well I think you can figure it out.... hehe. But he is! It's so exciting! Who knew that when you became a mom poop became exciting? Go figure.)
On that note - baby led weaning rocks. That's all there is to it!
- nectarine*
- mango
- yogurt
- papaya
- reduced-sugar rusks (a wheat/cornmeal dry biscuit thing)
- whole wheat toast
- carrot*
- parsnip*
- broccoli*
- avocado
- banana
- apple
- lamb shank*
- oatmeal
- asparagus*
- beets
- stir-fried beef
- noodles
- salmon*
- cheese
- home-made beef meatballs*
- peppers
- zucchini
- chicken breast
- tomato
- sardines
- apricot*
- pear
Some things he definitely didn't like. Yogurt, pear and oatmeal in particular. Some things - the ones with stars - he LOVES. He is for sure a carnivore.
On Sunday we went out for brunch/lunch. I had zucchini fritters with avocado and Chris had a chicken sandwich (made with freshly cooked, still warm chicken.) Gage had slices of avocado from my salad and a chunk of chicken and a slice of tomato from Chris' sandwich. He loved everything. He did ruin a cute pair of baby blue pants though by dropping huge chunks of avocado on them (avocado is a bit slippery and hard for him to handle) - but it was so fun to watch him. He clearly knows he's participating in the family meal.
It's also fun watching how he progresses. He's kind of figured out how to get at stuff that's in his fists... kinda. This morning he had lemon ricotta pancakes (Dad's birthday is a special day). He liked the apricot better though! And then we know he's done because he takes the food in his fist, holds it over the edge of the highchair... and let's it drop. Bye-bye food. I'm finished with you! And then we give him his cup of water, he takes a few sips, then tries to eat the cup, then spills the water, then tries to suck the water off the highchair tray. Haha. We should really get a video of this!
I am just loving baby-led weaning though. No stupid purees! He wouldn't let me spoon-fed him even if I tried. When I do try to put a spoon of something to his mouth, he purses his lips shut. (If I give him the spoon to feed himself, he will get it in his mouth - usually upside down though.) To watch him progress day by day in his ability to pick up food, get it to his mouth, and figure out how to chew and swallow - well it's just so fun! Like watching him try to figure out how to crawl. Except more enjoyable for everyone.
(Do you want to know how I know he is actually swallowing more and more food every day? Well I think you can figure it out.... hehe. But he is! It's so exciting! Who knew that when you became a mom poop became exciting? Go figure.)
On that note - baby led weaning rocks. That's all there is to it!
Friday, July 6, 2012
bam bam!
Gage at six months, two weeks.....
- can sit up completely unsupported
- has two front bottom teeth!
- has the most infectious smile
- laughs all the time
- protests going to sleep with various vocal acoustics (including a fake cough, and some funny consonant noises)
- will only fall asleep while being rocked in a dark room, walking in the ergo, or nursed in our bed
- has very inconveniently stopped falling asleep in the stroller
- will be woken up by ANY sudden noises (darn you, creaky floorboards!)
- loves nectarines and really devours them
- loves roasted carrot and steamed broccoli
- hates yogurt
- cannot pick up peas (stupid pincher grasp who needs you?)
- is supremely frustrated not to be able to pick up said peas (pincher grasp develop already!)
- is SO SO SO close to being able to crawl!
- by so so so close I mean that when put down on all fours he stays like that for a few seconds
- tries to scoot forward on his tummy but ends up scooting himself backwards
- has ended up in some pretty awkward scenarios because of said (in)ability
- like under the crib, under the coffee table (geez who's watching this baby?)
- loves to chew on EVERYTHING
- tries to eat my face
- tries to eat cords (baby proofing anyone?)
- thinks mommy's blackberry is the coolest thing around
- has almost developed a predictable nap schedule (almost, almost)
- loves when mommy blows raspberries on his tummy
- is totally over his old-hat (aka one-month old) trick of blowing raspberries himself (unless he's tired, or frustrated, or both)
- is the cutest baby on planet earth
- has developed a fun habit of banging his toys against the ground, and his fists on the highchair when he's done with food
- is our little Bam Bam now - bam bam! bam bam!
- is showing his mom and dad just how much of a handful he will be in a few months/years time
- is the best, most precious, loveable handful his mom and dad could ever ask for
- can sit up completely unsupported
- has two front bottom teeth!
- has the most infectious smile
- laughs all the time
- protests going to sleep with various vocal acoustics (including a fake cough, and some funny consonant noises)
- will only fall asleep while being rocked in a dark room, walking in the ergo, or nursed in our bed
- has very inconveniently stopped falling asleep in the stroller
- will be woken up by ANY sudden noises (darn you, creaky floorboards!)
- loves nectarines and really devours them
- loves roasted carrot and steamed broccoli
- hates yogurt
- cannot pick up peas (stupid pincher grasp who needs you?)
- is supremely frustrated not to be able to pick up said peas (pincher grasp develop already!)
- is SO SO SO close to being able to crawl!
- by so so so close I mean that when put down on all fours he stays like that for a few seconds
- tries to scoot forward on his tummy but ends up scooting himself backwards
- has ended up in some pretty awkward scenarios because of said (in)ability
- like under the crib, under the coffee table (geez who's watching this baby?)
- loves to chew on EVERYTHING
- tries to eat my face
- tries to eat cords (baby proofing anyone?)
- thinks mommy's blackberry is the coolest thing around
- has almost developed a predictable nap schedule (almost, almost)
- loves when mommy blows raspberries on his tummy
- is totally over his old-hat (aka one-month old) trick of blowing raspberries himself (unless he's tired, or frustrated, or both)
- is the cutest baby on planet earth
- has developed a fun habit of banging his toys against the ground, and his fists on the highchair when he's done with food
- is our little Bam Bam now - bam bam! bam bam!
- is showing his mom and dad just how much of a handful he will be in a few months/years time
- is the best, most precious, loveable handful his mom and dad could ever ask for
Friday, June 22, 2012
Baby essentials, first three months, Part 1
This is only Part 1 folks.... the main attractions, the ones that stand out most in my mind.
The Happiest Baby on the Block
Buy this. Read this. BEFORE you go into labor! Even if you end up not using all his techniques it is very helpful to know his theory about the first three months of a baby's life being the "fourth trimester" because God help us all it is SO true. After three months it's like a light switch and these incomprehensible beings become human babies.
Moby wrap
This baby carrier looks very complicated to put on... and the first few times you do it, it is. (DO practice and familiarize yourself with it when you're pregnant.) But after you get the hang of it, it is super easy and the best way on earth to calm a screaming newborn. And then, once you've walked around with him in it and put him to sleep you can do some catching up on your email, or do an errand, or take him gently out, place him into a crib and you can get some sleep too!
For the first 3 months of Gage's life he always had an upset tummy so he spent an inordinate amount of his wakeful time screaming his head off. So I would head out with him in the stroller, he would fall asleep in the stroller, but the second he woke up he would start with the hysterical crying. I would put on the Moby, put him in it, and resume walking (with my diaper bag now in the stroller), and he would shut up! Needless to say, I never ever left the house without the Moby in those early months.
Baby Bjorn Babysitter Bouncer
This is probably the hands down best baby product ever invented. (Not that I'm prone to hyperbole or anything.) But seriously it's amazing. Of course it's got the price tag to match, but don't let that deter you... it is worth its weight in gold! Not that it weighs very much of course... it is super lightweight, and can even be easily moved and adjusted with one hand while holding a sleeping baby in the other. (Not that this is something I recommend doing. Have your man servant, er I mean husband, do it for you.)
Why is this product so great? First of all, it bounces when baby moves. So when you place sleeping baby in it when it is in the "sleep" position he stays asleep. (There are three tilt levels, sleep, rest and play - the latter being the most upright of course) Why does he stay asleep? Because any movements he makes merely make the seat bounce so his own movements rock him right back to sleep - brilliant! I don't know how I would have survived the first few months without this. Our routine was, breastfed him to sleep on the couch and then gently transfer him into the bouncer so mommy could actually get something done. (If placed in a cot he would immediately wake up. Like he had cot-dar or something - waaaaaaahhhh! I want a warm body next to mine! Pick me up! This cot does not remind me at all of being in the warm womb!) In fact, we were so dependent on this thing STILL at four months that we brought it back to the states with us. It folds up completely flat and fit perfectly in the bottom of our large duffel bag.
This is a fancy, expensive bucket. But it makes bathing a floppy-headed newborn 1,000x easier! They literally can't topple over - and they also apparently like it because it reminds them of being in the womb.Gage's first few baths were miserable for everyone involved until we figured out that we were making the water too hot! He likes it at 95 degrees (the "recommended" temperature we were using was 100.) Five degrees of wonderful difference - now Gage loves bath time.
I can't underscore enough how important swaddling is in those first few weeks. A properly done swaddle will calm almost any baby, and a tightly swaddled baby stays asleep longer. Newborns have a primitive reflex called the Moro reflex. It's a relic of our tree-swinging ancestors. Basically, if a newborn feels like she is falling (which happens when they are on their backs - which is the only way you should put a baby to sleep - NOT on their tummies or on their side) then she will fail out her arms.... all the better to catch passing branches with! It's kind of cute the first few times they wake themselves up this manner. And then its cuteness declines in rapid reverse proportion to how annoying it actually is. (There are no branches kid! We don't live in trees - go back to sleep!) So swaddling is a must, for that reason, and also because it reminds them of being tightly packed in the womb. Dr. Karp writes extensively on the wonders of the swaddle in The Happiest Baby and it is really worth reading it all. You should also master swaddling a teddy bear before you give birth. And make it really tight! A loose swaddle is a suffocation hazard. (Although the reason these blankets are amazing is that they are so light so if the swaddle were to come undone and the blanket to cover baby's nose, it probably would still be okay? STILL learn to swaddle RIGHT TIGHT!)
And in the department of baby-soothing... you should also keep a hairdryer handy... it makes the screaming stop immediately....
The Happiest Baby on the Block
Buy this. Read this. BEFORE you go into labor! Even if you end up not using all his techniques it is very helpful to know his theory about the first three months of a baby's life being the "fourth trimester" because God help us all it is SO true. After three months it's like a light switch and these incomprehensible beings become human babies.
Moby wrap
This baby carrier looks very complicated to put on... and the first few times you do it, it is. (DO practice and familiarize yourself with it when you're pregnant.) But after you get the hang of it, it is super easy and the best way on earth to calm a screaming newborn. And then, once you've walked around with him in it and put him to sleep you can do some catching up on your email, or do an errand, or take him gently out, place him into a crib and you can get some sleep too!
For the first 3 months of Gage's life he always had an upset tummy so he spent an inordinate amount of his wakeful time screaming his head off. So I would head out with him in the stroller, he would fall asleep in the stroller, but the second he woke up he would start with the hysterical crying. I would put on the Moby, put him in it, and resume walking (with my diaper bag now in the stroller), and he would shut up! Needless to say, I never ever left the house without the Moby in those early months.
Baby Bjorn Babysitter Bouncer
This is probably the hands down best baby product ever invented. (Not that I'm prone to hyperbole or anything.) But seriously it's amazing. Of course it's got the price tag to match, but don't let that deter you... it is worth its weight in gold! Not that it weighs very much of course... it is super lightweight, and can even be easily moved and adjusted with one hand while holding a sleeping baby in the other. (Not that this is something I recommend doing. Have your man servant, er I mean husband, do it for you.)
Why is this product so great? First of all, it bounces when baby moves. So when you place sleeping baby in it when it is in the "sleep" position he stays asleep. (There are three tilt levels, sleep, rest and play - the latter being the most upright of course) Why does he stay asleep? Because any movements he makes merely make the seat bounce so his own movements rock him right back to sleep - brilliant! I don't know how I would have survived the first few months without this. Our routine was, breastfed him to sleep on the couch and then gently transfer him into the bouncer so mommy could actually get something done. (If placed in a cot he would immediately wake up. Like he had cot-dar or something - waaaaaaahhhh! I want a warm body next to mine! Pick me up! This cot does not remind me at all of being in the warm womb!) In fact, we were so dependent on this thing STILL at four months that we brought it back to the states with us. It folds up completely flat and fit perfectly in the bottom of our large duffel bag.
 |
| Gage at five days old napping through the unwrapping of his presents from Santa on Christmas day. |
Now that Gage has outgrown napping in this thing, I still use it almost
every day. (Side note, he physically outgrew the weight limit for the
sleep and rest settings very early - I still wish he would nap in it!
Right now he is napping on my chest in the Ergo - another baby product
must-have which will be in another posting.) But I still use the bouncer every day -
he enjoys batting at the toy bar we now have on it, and I bring him
into the kitchen when I'm cooking dinner and he will amuse himself in it
for 20 minutes or so if I occasionally talk to him while I'm cooking.
He'd much prefer to be sitting on the ground, but unfortunately, he
can't quite keep himself up a reliable portion of the time - no precious noggins falling smack on the floor please!
 | |||
| Gage always fell asleep after feeding for the first two months. |
Quite simply, invaluable for the early weeks of breastfeeding. You won't need it once they have good head control and can hold themselves up better, but seriously for the first two months when they spend the majority of their waking hours on your boob, you will be very thankful for this supportive, comfortable pillow. And also for your ipad, TV and/or a good book.
This is a fancy, expensive bucket. But it makes bathing a floppy-headed newborn 1,000x easier! They literally can't topple over - and they also apparently like it because it reminds them of being in the womb.Gage's first few baths were miserable for everyone involved until we figured out that we were making the water too hot! He likes it at 95 degrees (the "recommended" temperature we were using was 100.) Five degrees of wonderful difference - now Gage loves bath time.
I can't underscore enough how important swaddling is in those first few weeks. A properly done swaddle will calm almost any baby, and a tightly swaddled baby stays asleep longer. Newborns have a primitive reflex called the Moro reflex. It's a relic of our tree-swinging ancestors. Basically, if a newborn feels like she is falling (which happens when they are on their backs - which is the only way you should put a baby to sleep - NOT on their tummies or on their side) then she will fail out her arms.... all the better to catch passing branches with! It's kind of cute the first few times they wake themselves up this manner. And then its cuteness declines in rapid reverse proportion to how annoying it actually is. (There are no branches kid! We don't live in trees - go back to sleep!) So swaddling is a must, for that reason, and also because it reminds them of being tightly packed in the womb. Dr. Karp writes extensively on the wonders of the swaddle in The Happiest Baby and it is really worth reading it all. You should also master swaddling a teddy bear before you give birth. And make it really tight! A loose swaddle is a suffocation hazard. (Although the reason these blankets are amazing is that they are so light so if the swaddle were to come undone and the blanket to cover baby's nose, it probably would still be okay? STILL learn to swaddle RIGHT TIGHT!)
These blankets are so useful in a myriad other ways. As stroller sun-shade, picnic blanket, floor blanket, stroller blanket, regular blanket (although never put loose blankets in a crib with an infant - more on that later), burp cloth, and nursing cover! I always have one of these in my diaper bag.
And in the department of baby-soothing... you should also keep a hairdryer handy... it makes the screaming stop immediately....
 |
| a quiet baby and the |
Wednesday, June 20, 2012
And six months later.... we're back! Happy Half Birthday to my sweet baby boy
The last post on this blog was the day before I gave birth!
Exactly six months ago, on December 20th early, early in the morning I had my first contractions. By 10:11pm that evening Gage Henry Stevens made a hurried entrance into this world.
I still can't quite believe that he's real... he is the joy and light of my life - so smiley, happy, loveable - so perfect in every way that sometimes it feels like the past 6 months have been a wonderful dream! I am undoubtedly the most lucky woman on earth (nothing like being objective about these things) and not a day goes by that I do not kiss his little checks and say "mommy loves you so so so SO much!" Because I do. Much, much more than I can adequately express in words.
But the point of this blog is not to be a love-fest about my precious boy. Rather it is to keep a record for myself and others of how to parent a newborn, an infant, a baby, and eventually, a toddler. (With a few cute photos along the way.) For the past 6 months I've had the benefit of no job or other children so that I had/have time to research everything baby related - and I also now have more than a dozen friends with babies of similar ages so I have lots of moms to compare notes with.
Things from the past six months that I must cover:
1. Breastfeeding! - ahh breastfeeding. Seems so simple, no? No! It's not. At least not in the beginning. But it is so wonderful and easy once you've got it down.... I have SO much to say on this topic.
2. Baby products, by age group
3. Developmental milestones
4. Weaning (aka the introduction of solid food)
5. Infant sleep (ahhh pregnant people out there... enjoy those uninterrupted nights you lucky, lucky thing you, you don't know how lucky you are...)
6. Birth
There's so much I've learned - and so much that I've already forgotten! (Think pregnancy brain is bad... wait for baby brain - it's worse because you don't have crazy hormones to blame for your seeming absent-mindedness. Your partner will swear you are actually blonde.)
And since my good friend from childhood just broke the news to me that she is pregnant and due in October (yaaayy!! 'cuse me while I do a happy jig around the living room)... I want to start off with the fun stuff, which is of course, buying baby stuff!! This will require some thought however, so I will end it here for tonight and leave you with a very happy half birthday photo of my bugaboo, my bubba, my chunky monkey, my sweet baby Gage.
Exactly six months ago, on December 20th early, early in the morning I had my first contractions. By 10:11pm that evening Gage Henry Stevens made a hurried entrance into this world.
I still can't quite believe that he's real... he is the joy and light of my life - so smiley, happy, loveable - so perfect in every way that sometimes it feels like the past 6 months have been a wonderful dream! I am undoubtedly the most lucky woman on earth (nothing like being objective about these things) and not a day goes by that I do not kiss his little checks and say "mommy loves you so so so SO much!" Because I do. Much, much more than I can adequately express in words.
But the point of this blog is not to be a love-fest about my precious boy. Rather it is to keep a record for myself and others of how to parent a newborn, an infant, a baby, and eventually, a toddler. (With a few cute photos along the way.) For the past 6 months I've had the benefit of no job or other children so that I had/have time to research everything baby related - and I also now have more than a dozen friends with babies of similar ages so I have lots of moms to compare notes with.
Things from the past six months that I must cover:
1. Breastfeeding! - ahh breastfeeding. Seems so simple, no? No! It's not. At least not in the beginning. But it is so wonderful and easy once you've got it down.... I have SO much to say on this topic.
2. Baby products, by age group
3. Developmental milestones
4. Weaning (aka the introduction of solid food)
5. Infant sleep (ahhh pregnant people out there... enjoy those uninterrupted nights you lucky, lucky thing you, you don't know how lucky you are...)
6. Birth
There's so much I've learned - and so much that I've already forgotten! (Think pregnancy brain is bad... wait for baby brain - it's worse because you don't have crazy hormones to blame for your seeming absent-mindedness. Your partner will swear you are actually blonde.)
And since my good friend from childhood just broke the news to me that she is pregnant and due in October (yaaayy!! 'cuse me while I do a happy jig around the living room)... I want to start off with the fun stuff, which is of course, buying baby stuff!! This will require some thought however, so I will end it here for tonight and leave you with a very happy half birthday photo of my bugaboo, my bubba, my chunky monkey, my sweet baby Gage.
Monday, December 19, 2011
What to expect in nine months of creating a human being
Baby boy clearly has not gotten the message that it's time to move out. He is very warm, comfy and continuously held & fed inside thank you very much and he would like to extend his stay beyond his estimated day of eviction.
In waiting for baby boy to decide he wants to come out, I've been trying to constantly monitor my own "symptoms" to see if labor is imminent. Apparently, sometimes you can feel sick beforehand with flu-like symptoms. You can have a "bloody show" when the mucus plug comes out. You can have increasing Braxton-Hicks (practice) contractions. But it is more likely that you will have none of these! Anecdotal evidence from friends suggests that sometimes you feel more tired the day before - or that your face and fingers swell more in the week before. But that doesn't seem like much to go on since fatigue and swelling is common in all of late pregnancy.
In a nice parallel symmetry, this symptom-checking reminds me very much of the very first two weeks of this pregnancy - that period commonly know as the "two-week wait," when you could possibly be pregnant but can't yet get a positive pregnancy test result and every little abnormality is questioned and re-questioned. The problem with the 2 week wait is that it happens to also be that period of time when you get PMS if you aren't pregnant... and early pregnancy symptoms and PMS are remarkably alike. Go figure.
Given that, I thought I'd take a look back on the past 9 months. In particular, comparing what was I expecting and what was I questioning at the beginning, and how things actually panned out.
Early pregnancy symptoms
I am one of these lucky ones who doesn't really get any PMS, no cramps or anything. I do tend to get a tad weepy and crave sweet, chocolatey things more than normal. So OF COURSE my early pregnancy symptoms included feeling a tad weepy and craving sweet, chocolatey things. But three things that I did have which I normally don't have (but which - again - some women will count among normal PMS symptoms) is feeling very tired, sore & tender breasts, and slight pain & pressure in my lower abdomen. I also, all of a sudden, had a strong aversion to tea & coffee in the morning, and beer & wine tasted so... weird and bad! (You will be happy to know that said aversions disappeared entirely by the third trimester. I chalk this up to my body's incredible ability to steer me away from substances that would have harmed baby boy's developing organs in the first and second trimesters - but I don't think this is such a common aversion to develop, so it probably won't happen to you.)
Basically, my advice for the two week wait is to just try not to symptom-check while waiting, and avoid all alcohol and reduce your caffeine consumption - just in case. First trimester is the most important time to not drink!
"Morning" sickness
First of all, forget about the name. This is ALL DAY sickness. Well, for me it was all day. For others it strikes at particular times. But in no way delude yourself into thinking that it only happens in the morning. I suffered from almost constant nausea, and occasional bouts of actually being sick, from week 6 to week 18. I was unable to stomach most foods and particularly revolted by vegetables (go figure) and meat products (especially chicken - I couldn't walk by a KFC without wanting to vomit). My nausea was worse in the morning, and the only thing that made it better was if I ate something (cereal, crackers, or dried fruit) before getting up out of bed. And I mean, the only way it worked was if I ate something while still lying down, no getting up at all. Which means you need a co-operative husband, or the foresight to stack your nightstand.
If you also happen to suffer from nausea and sickness during your first trimester you can comfort yourself with the knowledge that your chances of having a miscarriage are lower than those who don't. Apparently the nausea is from all those good pregnancy hormones, and the creation of the placenta and your little guy or gal's major internal organs.
Given that, I've spoken with many other women who never suffered from any nausea at all. And no food aversions. At all. All I can say to them is GO AWAY, DON'T TALK TO ME, I DISLIKE YOU. If you think that is an extreme response then you clearly haven't ever had constant all-day nausea for 12 weeks in a row.
Other fun symptoms
Extreme fatigue and exhaustion in the first trimester. Really. Sleeping 10 hours at night AND taking a 2 hour nap. And then at week 16 when you're like, oh the pregnancy books say I should be energized since I'm in the fun second trimester stage, but oh I still feel like I got hit by a train, I must be iron-deficient! You're not! (Or at least I wasn't.) Your body is just beat from creating all major internal organs of a human being from scratch.
SPD or PGP - I won't talk about this here because it is NOT that common. The funny thing about pregnancy symptoms is, other than fatigue and weight gain, everyone's symptoms and experiences are going to be completely different and you will end up suffering from things no one's told you about. For example, I know a woman who has this extreme pregnancy rash that is so painful she has to take steroids to block the pain. And another who had such bad swelling her entire pregnancy that she won't get pregnant again. These are not "normal" but then again, nothing really is! The truth is, you can't know what to expect from your body until you've done it once. Not even your own mother's experience is a good indicator of what to expect. Expect the unexpected. But read that pregnancy bible "what to expect when you're expecting" anyway. At least that will give you a barometer of what KIND OF to expect.
Weight Gain
They say not to expect almost any gain in the first trimester, and then 1-2 lbs a week in the second and third trimesters. I gained a lot in the sixth and seventh months because I was SO HUNGRY, all the time. And I was kind of paranoid about not giving my baby the nutrients he needed. So I probably ate too much. Hmmm, scratch that, I DID eat too much. Add to that the fact that I couldn't exercise because of my SPD, and hello! you get a 50-lb pregnancy weight gain! But my friend gained 45 lbs, she gave birth in August, and she's already lost all of it except 5 lbs. SO. I have FAITH.
Baby bump
When will I show?? I must have googled that a milion times. The fact of the matter is that you most certainly will think you are showing long before you actually are showing. I thought I was showing at 17 weeks. I was kind of showing. I thought I was HUGE at 20 weeks. I was not. I was for sure showing at that point though. Although, I think most first-time women are not. I think the combination of my very short and narrow torso and loose abdominal muscles made me show earlier. For subsequent pregnancies you show much earlier.
Clothing
See weight gain. Don't over-buy. Don't buy anything at all in your first trimester. Trust me. Just take a hair tie and loop it through your jean button and wear them AS LONG AS POSSIBLE. You will miss them. Also what fits you in the second trimester almost certainly will NOT still fit you in the third. Your belly, the same one that is swimming in this "so huge!" maternity top at 24 weeks, will be busting out of it by 34. Trust me on this one. Luckily, by 34 weeks you kind of stop caring what you look like anyway. You also stop caring about the condition of those shirts that are not maternity but "I don't want to stretch them out so I'm going to not wear them". You wear them. And dream about what clothing you will buy to replace them once you no longer resemble a beached whale.
So as you can see, pregnancy is FUN! And totally different for everyone.
But I am so ready to not be pregnant anymore. Just for the record.
In waiting for baby boy to decide he wants to come out, I've been trying to constantly monitor my own "symptoms" to see if labor is imminent. Apparently, sometimes you can feel sick beforehand with flu-like symptoms. You can have a "bloody show" when the mucus plug comes out. You can have increasing Braxton-Hicks (practice) contractions. But it is more likely that you will have none of these! Anecdotal evidence from friends suggests that sometimes you feel more tired the day before - or that your face and fingers swell more in the week before. But that doesn't seem like much to go on since fatigue and swelling is common in all of late pregnancy.
In a nice parallel symmetry, this symptom-checking reminds me very much of the very first two weeks of this pregnancy - that period commonly know as the "two-week wait," when you could possibly be pregnant but can't yet get a positive pregnancy test result and every little abnormality is questioned and re-questioned. The problem with the 2 week wait is that it happens to also be that period of time when you get PMS if you aren't pregnant... and early pregnancy symptoms and PMS are remarkably alike. Go figure.
Given that, I thought I'd take a look back on the past 9 months. In particular, comparing what was I expecting and what was I questioning at the beginning, and how things actually panned out.
Early pregnancy symptoms
I am one of these lucky ones who doesn't really get any PMS, no cramps or anything. I do tend to get a tad weepy and crave sweet, chocolatey things more than normal. So OF COURSE my early pregnancy symptoms included feeling a tad weepy and craving sweet, chocolatey things. But three things that I did have which I normally don't have (but which - again - some women will count among normal PMS symptoms) is feeling very tired, sore & tender breasts, and slight pain & pressure in my lower abdomen. I also, all of a sudden, had a strong aversion to tea & coffee in the morning, and beer & wine tasted so... weird and bad! (You will be happy to know that said aversions disappeared entirely by the third trimester. I chalk this up to my body's incredible ability to steer me away from substances that would have harmed baby boy's developing organs in the first and second trimesters - but I don't think this is such a common aversion to develop, so it probably won't happen to you.)
Basically, my advice for the two week wait is to just try not to symptom-check while waiting, and avoid all alcohol and reduce your caffeine consumption - just in case. First trimester is the most important time to not drink!
"Morning" sickness
First of all, forget about the name. This is ALL DAY sickness. Well, for me it was all day. For others it strikes at particular times. But in no way delude yourself into thinking that it only happens in the morning. I suffered from almost constant nausea, and occasional bouts of actually being sick, from week 6 to week 18. I was unable to stomach most foods and particularly revolted by vegetables (go figure) and meat products (especially chicken - I couldn't walk by a KFC without wanting to vomit). My nausea was worse in the morning, and the only thing that made it better was if I ate something (cereal, crackers, or dried fruit) before getting up out of bed. And I mean, the only way it worked was if I ate something while still lying down, no getting up at all. Which means you need a co-operative husband, or the foresight to stack your nightstand.
If you also happen to suffer from nausea and sickness during your first trimester you can comfort yourself with the knowledge that your chances of having a miscarriage are lower than those who don't. Apparently the nausea is from all those good pregnancy hormones, and the creation of the placenta and your little guy or gal's major internal organs.
Given that, I've spoken with many other women who never suffered from any nausea at all. And no food aversions. At all. All I can say to them is GO AWAY, DON'T TALK TO ME, I DISLIKE YOU. If you think that is an extreme response then you clearly haven't ever had constant all-day nausea for 12 weeks in a row.
Other fun symptoms
Extreme fatigue and exhaustion in the first trimester. Really. Sleeping 10 hours at night AND taking a 2 hour nap. And then at week 16 when you're like, oh the pregnancy books say I should be energized since I'm in the fun second trimester stage, but oh I still feel like I got hit by a train, I must be iron-deficient! You're not! (Or at least I wasn't.) Your body is just beat from creating all major internal organs of a human being from scratch.
SPD or PGP - I won't talk about this here because it is NOT that common. The funny thing about pregnancy symptoms is, other than fatigue and weight gain, everyone's symptoms and experiences are going to be completely different and you will end up suffering from things no one's told you about. For example, I know a woman who has this extreme pregnancy rash that is so painful she has to take steroids to block the pain. And another who had such bad swelling her entire pregnancy that she won't get pregnant again. These are not "normal" but then again, nothing really is! The truth is, you can't know what to expect from your body until you've done it once. Not even your own mother's experience is a good indicator of what to expect. Expect the unexpected. But read that pregnancy bible "what to expect when you're expecting" anyway. At least that will give you a barometer of what KIND OF to expect.
Weight Gain
They say not to expect almost any gain in the first trimester, and then 1-2 lbs a week in the second and third trimesters. I gained a lot in the sixth and seventh months because I was SO HUNGRY, all the time. And I was kind of paranoid about not giving my baby the nutrients he needed. So I probably ate too much. Hmmm, scratch that, I DID eat too much. Add to that the fact that I couldn't exercise because of my SPD, and hello! you get a 50-lb pregnancy weight gain! But my friend gained 45 lbs, she gave birth in August, and she's already lost all of it except 5 lbs. SO. I have FAITH.
Baby bump
When will I show?? I must have googled that a milion times. The fact of the matter is that you most certainly will think you are showing long before you actually are showing. I thought I was showing at 17 weeks. I was kind of showing. I thought I was HUGE at 20 weeks. I was not. I was for sure showing at that point though. Although, I think most first-time women are not. I think the combination of my very short and narrow torso and loose abdominal muscles made me show earlier. For subsequent pregnancies you show much earlier.
Clothing
See weight gain. Don't over-buy. Don't buy anything at all in your first trimester. Trust me. Just take a hair tie and loop it through your jean button and wear them AS LONG AS POSSIBLE. You will miss them. Also what fits you in the second trimester almost certainly will NOT still fit you in the third. Your belly, the same one that is swimming in this "so huge!" maternity top at 24 weeks, will be busting out of it by 34. Trust me on this one. Luckily, by 34 weeks you kind of stop caring what you look like anyway. You also stop caring about the condition of those shirts that are not maternity but "I don't want to stretch them out so I'm going to not wear them". You wear them. And dream about what clothing you will buy to replace them once you no longer resemble a beached whale.
So as you can see, pregnancy is FUN! And totally different for everyone.
But I am so ready to not be pregnant anymore. Just for the record.
Wednesday, December 7, 2011
all I want for christmas.....
is baby!
I'm in my 39th week of pregnancy this week (technically that's called 38 weeks pregnant here.) Either way it means only a few more days till my due date! If I make it there? Don't want to jinx it, but I feel like baby boy must be ready to meet the world. I just can't get any bigger! At the midwife appointment today she said I'm 3/5 engaged - which means baby's head is nestled nicely in the pelvis. Not that that means anything - first babies can engage a few weeks before birth or a few days, or even hours. We'll just have to wait and see! Waiting...
waiting,
waiting.
Friday, December 2, 2011
A look back...
Since the end of this pregnancy is now well in sight, I thought I'd take a look back... here's something I wrote before I found out I was pregnant...
I ended up getting a very faint second line on a pregnancy test on the morning of April 8th (Day 27 of what is usually a 29 day cycle.) It was so faint that I took another test on the 10th just to be sure - a digital one, that clearly said 1-2 weeks pregnant! (Which really means 3-4 weeks because in crazy pregnancy math, you are "pregnant" while you are still having your last period; your pregnancy is dated starting from the first day of your last period.) My pre-positive test symptoms that led me to believe I was pregnant without proof of the test included: cramping (I normally don't get cramps ever); a sudden aversion to beer, wine, coffee and tea; feeling very sad and tired for no reason; and a stabby pain in my boobs. And then the nausea and extreme exhaustion started at week 6 and didn't fully let up until week 18. FUN. STUFF.
But now I'm 16 days from my due date - what a long journey its been, and what an incredible one is in store....
March 30th 2011
So I told my mom and my dad I thought I might be pregnant yesterday afternoon. I don’t know what got into me. Maybe it was because C was so late coming home, and I hadn’t spoken a single word to anybody all day long, but I called my mom and said “I think I might be pregnant.” I called my dad an hour later and basically said the same thing to him but in a much different way. But, I’m getting ahead of myself. My mom’s reaction was priceless.
Me: “I think I’m pregnant.”
Mom: “I know.”
Me: “What?!?”
Mom: “The psychic told me last week you were pregnant.”
Me: “But I didn’t know I was pregnant last week – and I still don’t actually know, I just think!”
Mom: silence
Me: “Okay.”
Mom: “She said you’re having a boy.”
Me: “Cool.”
After hanging up with the psychic queen, I realized I hadn’t called my other parental half to inquire after his home-sale. I couldn’t really get too involved or exciting about the sale because I kept on thinking about how I might, might, might be pregnant. And then he started talking about coming to visit in September, and my mind starts working over-drive. < If he comes in September then he’ll have to come again in December when the baby would be due, and won’t I be going home in August for a baby shower? > All these thoughts – mind you – predicated on a supposition that was and is far from proven fact! Needless to say, I blurted out, “Well, you know, there may be a reason for you to come over in December because I might be pregnant!” My dad followed this announcement with congratulations, which I quickly stemmed, reminding him that it was a big maybe!
Dad: “Well, are your checks rosy?”
Me: “That’s so funny because actually my checks have been really flushed the past few days.”
Dad: “I can always tell when a woman is pregnant because her checks are rosy.”
Me: “Really?”
Dad: “Sure I can!”
So, you see, my dad is a pregnancy seer! He lives in New Hampshire though, so fellow wanna-be-mums, you should be prepared for a long journey to undergo his rosy-cheek analysis.
I ended up getting a very faint second line on a pregnancy test on the morning of April 8th (Day 27 of what is usually a 29 day cycle.) It was so faint that I took another test on the 10th just to be sure - a digital one, that clearly said 1-2 weeks pregnant! (Which really means 3-4 weeks because in crazy pregnancy math, you are "pregnant" while you are still having your last period; your pregnancy is dated starting from the first day of your last period.) My pre-positive test symptoms that led me to believe I was pregnant without proof of the test included: cramping (I normally don't get cramps ever); a sudden aversion to beer, wine, coffee and tea; feeling very sad and tired for no reason; and a stabby pain in my boobs. And then the nausea and extreme exhaustion started at week 6 and didn't fully let up until week 18. FUN. STUFF.
But now I'm 16 days from my due date - what a long journey its been, and what an incredible one is in store....
Tuesday, November 29, 2011
Full term!
I forgot to say that today I am officially* full-term at 37 weeks*!! Yay! That means if I go into labor today I can go to the birth center as baby boy is, medically-speaking, already all set for life outside the womb.
Did you hear that baby boy? You're officially fully developed and ready to meet us! It's your cue to arrive.... we're waiting patiently...
Because my pelvic pain is getting worse by the day, I don't think I'll be waiting as patiently in a weeks' time. Then it will be the hour for please-tell-me-every-single-old-wives-tale-about-inducing-labor-pretty-please-I'll-try-anything. Eating entire pineapples & mouth-searing curries, drinking raspberry-leaf tea, even watching The Bourne Identity (really?! something about the camera shaking...) will all be commenced shortly if baby boy hasn't come by next week. (Which, er, I don't think he will. I don't feel any special premonitions about the next week or two... Are you supposed to?)
Me and my basketball belly above. Apologies for my disheveled appearance. My wardrobe is seriously limited these days and always includes the stylish white pelvic-support belt you can see at the bottom of the picture - so fashionable, I know!
*My EDD based on the first day of my last period is December 18th - I like the sound of this date a lot better than my revised, official EDD (based on my 12 week ultrasound) which is December 20th, so I've been saying the 18th is my due date whenever anyone who isn't a medical professional asks. So unofficially I was full-term two days ago...
** I'm 37 weeks pregnant, which means I'm in my 38th week of pregnancy.
Did you hear that baby boy? You're officially fully developed and ready to meet us! It's your cue to arrive.... we're waiting patiently...
Because my pelvic pain is getting worse by the day, I don't think I'll be waiting as patiently in a weeks' time. Then it will be the hour for please-tell-me-every-single-old-wives-tale-about-inducing-labor-pretty-please-I'll-try-anything. Eating entire pineapples & mouth-searing curries, drinking raspberry-leaf tea, even watching The Bourne Identity (really?! something about the camera shaking...) will all be commenced shortly if baby boy hasn't come by next week. (Which, er, I don't think he will. I don't feel any special premonitions about the next week or two... Are you supposed to?)
Me and my basketball belly above. Apologies for my disheveled appearance. My wardrobe is seriously limited these days and always includes the stylish white pelvic-support belt you can see at the bottom of the picture - so fashionable, I know!
*My EDD based on the first day of my last period is December 18th - I like the sound of this date a lot better than my revised, official EDD (based on my 12 week ultrasound) which is December 20th, so I've been saying the 18th is my due date whenever anyone who isn't a medical professional asks. So unofficially I was full-term two days ago...
** I'm 37 weeks pregnant, which means I'm in my 38th week of pregnancy.
birth plans
I went to the water birth workshop at my hospital's birthing centre yesterday. It was - to employ local parlance - absolutely brillant!!! So informative - and whereas before I thought I would only want to labor in the pool but not give birth in it - now I 100% want to give birth in water. I think it will be especially helpful for me to be in the water to take weight off my poor dysfunctioning pelvis, I just need to be careful about getting in and out of the pool. It also is no problem that I have GBS and will need to have intravenous antibiotics every four hours throughout labor - they just put a rubber glove over the hand that has the cannula... still not sure how that keeps the water out, but if I have to just keep one hand out of the water I think I can deal with that. They also addressed all my other worries about water births. They have telemetric fetal monitoring which is waterproof and thus can be used to continuously monitor baby's heart-beat if need be. (Although I would prefer that, if everything is going normally, that they only monitor baby's heart-beat every 15 minutes. Intermittent monitoring is just as effective and results in fewer false alarms of fetal distress.) Some more embarrassing aspects of giving birth were also addressed. (Er, you know, contact me if you want to know more.) You don't have to get out of the pool at all. They examine you with a flashlight and a mirror while you're in the pool. You can also use gas & air while in the pool, and there is a shower head for some water massage! All in all it sounds just exactly how I want to go through this powerful, painful, wonderful, empowering, life-changing, life-giving experience.
I am so lucky to be giving birth in the UK where birthing centers and water births are integral, accepted and encouraged within the medical establishment. Where midwives run the show, view birth as a natural process, and have experience and enthusiasm for natural, non-medicated births. I don't belittle or begrudge those who have a medicalized birth - I think that it is much safer for a woman to have an epidural if her experience of birth pain is excruciating and she is unable to cope. There are also many things that can go wrong in labor that require immediate medical intervention. There is a reason why getting pregnant used to be the most dangerous thing a woman could do! Before modern medicine your chances of dying in labor were quite high. However, the medicalization of birth has been taken to an extreme in the US and I really dread having to give birth back home next time, unless I can find a birthing center! (I would have a home-birth next time, but our insurance wouldn't cover that.) I am also so lucky to be giving birth in the UK because all my care is completely 100% free. Even though our US insurance covers 100% of "wellness visits" - it only covers 80% of pregnancy and delivery related visits. Because apparently pregnancy is a "condition" and not a natural, normal part of life. So we are saving a lot of money by having this little guy in London at an NHS (National Health Service) hospital.
So I am so thankful to be giving birth here. So thankful that the following birth plan will raise ZERO eyebrows in the hospital birth center.
I AM SO EXCITED TO GIVE BIRTH. I know that sentiment makes many people cringe and innerly (or directly) call me crazy. Fine, think that I am crazy! But I just cannot wait for this empowering, emotional, most uplifting and dramatic moment of my life. Every time I watch a video of a baby being born I tear up. I just cannot wait to meet our baby boy.
Oh, and please excuse the British spelling in the following...
ta-da! here is my...
Birth Plan
Mother: Olivia Stevens
Birth Partner: husband, Chris Stevens
Key points:
- natural birth, gas & air only
- water birth
- GBS positive, wants antibiotics asap
- SPD
- Spontaneous pushing
- No episiotomy
- delayed cord cutting
- physiological third stage
- immediate skin to skin contact
- immediate breast-feeding
I am GBS positive – I would like antibiotics as soon as possible in labour.
I have SPD and am limited in the movements I can make. I would like to deliver in the water, or on all fours or on my side. If in case of an emergency I need to have an epidural, great care needs to be taken to ensure my legs are moved in parallel and not moved too far apart (my partner has a ribbon marked to how far I can move my legs without pain).
I do not want any medical pain relief, except gas & air. I plan on managing the pain through breathing, visualization, vocalization, massage, and water.
I want to push spontaneously – no directed pushing please.
Crowning – please remind me not to push through crowning. I want to avoid tearing and do not want an episiotomy.
I would like immediate skin to skin contact with my baby immediately after birth.
We want a delayed cord cutting, please wait until the cord has stopped pulsing before cutting the cord.
Physiological third stage of labour – I want to deliver the placenta naturally, please do not give any drugs, and do not use controlled cord traction. If the bleeding has become excessive or the placenta does not deliver naturally within 30 minutes, then we would like to re-evaluate.
I plan on breastfeeding immediately after birth.
I am so lucky to be giving birth in the UK where birthing centers and water births are integral, accepted and encouraged within the medical establishment. Where midwives run the show, view birth as a natural process, and have experience and enthusiasm for natural, non-medicated births. I don't belittle or begrudge those who have a medicalized birth - I think that it is much safer for a woman to have an epidural if her experience of birth pain is excruciating and she is unable to cope. There are also many things that can go wrong in labor that require immediate medical intervention. There is a reason why getting pregnant used to be the most dangerous thing a woman could do! Before modern medicine your chances of dying in labor were quite high. However, the medicalization of birth has been taken to an extreme in the US and I really dread having to give birth back home next time, unless I can find a birthing center! (I would have a home-birth next time, but our insurance wouldn't cover that.) I am also so lucky to be giving birth in the UK because all my care is completely 100% free. Even though our US insurance covers 100% of "wellness visits" - it only covers 80% of pregnancy and delivery related visits. Because apparently pregnancy is a "condition" and not a natural, normal part of life. So we are saving a lot of money by having this little guy in London at an NHS (National Health Service) hospital.
So I am so thankful to be giving birth here. So thankful that the following birth plan will raise ZERO eyebrows in the hospital birth center.
I AM SO EXCITED TO GIVE BIRTH. I know that sentiment makes many people cringe and innerly (or directly) call me crazy. Fine, think that I am crazy! But I just cannot wait for this empowering, emotional, most uplifting and dramatic moment of my life. Every time I watch a video of a baby being born I tear up. I just cannot wait to meet our baby boy.
Oh, and please excuse the British spelling in the following...
ta-da! here is my...
Birth Plan
Mother: Olivia Stevens
Birth Partner: husband, Chris Stevens
Key points:
- natural birth, gas & air only
- water birth
- GBS positive, wants antibiotics asap
- SPD
- Spontaneous pushing
- No episiotomy
- delayed cord cutting
- physiological third stage
- immediate skin to skin contact
- immediate breast-feeding
I am GBS positive – I would like antibiotics as soon as possible in labour.
I have SPD and am limited in the movements I can make. I would like to deliver in the water, or on all fours or on my side. If in case of an emergency I need to have an epidural, great care needs to be taken to ensure my legs are moved in parallel and not moved too far apart (my partner has a ribbon marked to how far I can move my legs without pain).
I do not want any medical pain relief, except gas & air. I plan on managing the pain through breathing, visualization, vocalization, massage, and water.
I want to push spontaneously – no directed pushing please.
Crowning – please remind me not to push through crowning. I want to avoid tearing and do not want an episiotomy.
I would like immediate skin to skin contact with my baby immediately after birth.
We want a delayed cord cutting, please wait until the cord has stopped pulsing before cutting the cord.
Physiological third stage of labour – I want to deliver the placenta naturally, please do not give any drugs, and do not use controlled cord traction. If the bleeding has become excessive or the placenta does not deliver naturally within 30 minutes, then we would like to re-evaluate.
I plan on breastfeeding immediately after birth.
Tuesday, November 22, 2011
Time to start packing...
One of the girls in my NCT class (remember we all have due-dates within 15 days of each other, all in December) gave birth on Sunday. Sunday, November 27th - 3 and a half weeks before her due date!! A due date which is only four days before my own!
This slap in the face of reality reminded me that, hm, yes, my hospital bag is still not completely packed. If I went into labor today I would arrive at the hospital with half the allotted crap I wanted to have. Which would probably not have been the end of the world given my tendency to over-pack and all - but I most certainly would be laboring in the clothes I arrived at the hospital in. Which is not cool according to me, because I want to be laboring in clothes I can throw away afterwards if necessary. (Given the amounts of blood involved in delivery I'm banking on the, yes, it will be necessary. And no, hospitals in England don't give you disposable gowns like they do in fancy American hospitals.) I do already have disposable underwear in there. But I wanted some pairs of cheap black panties too, in case the thought of wearing plastic becomes untenable (it already is somewhat so.) I have straws for drinking, but no tennis balls for massage. I have slippers (cheap hotel ones I can throw out) and flip-flops for the shower, but no towel. I could go on and on. Basically I am unprepared. Except for the baby's bag. The baby's bag is completely set to go! Because his was the most fun to pack, obviously. All those cute little onesies and receiving blankets and hats - oh my! Can I un-pack and re-pack for the fifth time just to ooggle again?
Wasn't that a fun list?? Now I get to go finish packing... because seriously... in one week EXACTLY I will be full-term. FULL TERM! DO YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS? THAT MEANS I COULD GO INTO LABOR ANY DAY! ANY. DAY. Phew. Fun, scary, exciting times.
I can't wait to meet baby boy.
This slap in the face of reality reminded me that, hm, yes, my hospital bag is still not completely packed. If I went into labor today I would arrive at the hospital with half the allotted crap I wanted to have. Which would probably not have been the end of the world given my tendency to over-pack and all - but I most certainly would be laboring in the clothes I arrived at the hospital in. Which is not cool according to me, because I want to be laboring in clothes I can throw away afterwards if necessary. (Given the amounts of blood involved in delivery I'm banking on the, yes, it will be necessary. And no, hospitals in England don't give you disposable gowns like they do in fancy American hospitals.) I do already have disposable underwear in there. But I wanted some pairs of cheap black panties too, in case the thought of wearing plastic becomes untenable (it already is somewhat so.) I have straws for drinking, but no tennis balls for massage. I have slippers (cheap hotel ones I can throw out) and flip-flops for the shower, but no towel. I could go on and on. Basically I am unprepared. Except for the baby's bag. The baby's bag is completely set to go! Because his was the most fun to pack, obviously. All those cute little onesies and receiving blankets and hats - oh my! Can I un-pack and re-pack for the fifth time just to ooggle again?
My hospital bags
*UK edition (in the US you wouldn't need clothes to labor in, or maternity pads, or diapers, because you pay your private hospital bill which includes all those freebies!)
DURING
Phone and charger
iPad + charger
camera + charger
power convertor
Glasses
Maternity notes
Many copies of birth plan
One (or two?) pillow(s) from home with not-so-great pillowcase w/ waterproof cover
Small coin purse for vending machines
Hairbands and headband
Chapstick
Back massager (tennis balls!, rolling pin?)
Chewing gum
Warm, comfortable socks that can be thrown out
Very old nightgown or t-shirt & shorts that can be thrown out
Bikini top for birthing pool
Big water bottle
Juice packs and snacks for hubby
Labor massage oil (rose, lavender)
Lavender essence (to dap on tissue)
Tissues
Washcloth
AFTER
Lanolin
Breast pads/ nursing pads
Nursing bras / tanks
Towel and washcloth
Toiletries (shampoo, conditioner, bodywash, body lotion, toothbrush, toothpaste, floss, face moisturizer)
Hairbrush
Deodorant
Flip-flops for shower
Contact lenses and eyedrops
Slippers
Sleeping mask
Zip-up fleece
Old PJ pants and button up shirt
Maternity pads
Disposable underwear AND cheap cotton underwear that can be thrown away if nec.
Baby book to record baby’s footprint and vital stats
Going home outfit for me
Make-up
BABY
Receiving & swaddling blankets
Hat
Diapers
Cotton wool (aka jumbo sized cotton balls, for cleaning baby's bum)
Going home outfit (a baseball sleeper! so cute, must assert American-ness from day 1)
Baby onesies and sleepers (3 of each)
Scratch mitts
Bib
Burp cloths
Snowsuit (one fleece for a warmer winter day, one intense fluffiness for a colder day)
Socks
Infant sleeping bag
Monday, November 14, 2011
All About the Boobs... what I've learned about feeding my baby
This past month Chris and I have been taking a great antenatal class in our local neighborhood. (Antenatal is apparently a very British term, I'm thinking the American term equivalent would be birth class?) The classes are run by a national charity called the National Childbirth Trust, and though the classes were not free, or cheap, they were pretty informative, helpful, and most importantly, we met some great other new parents. There were eight other couples, all of us have due dates within 15 days of each other, and we all live within 1/2 hour of each other. (One of the couples lives literally right around the corner!) Class was also like a mini UN - Greek, Australian, Portuguese, New Zealander, Iranian, American, and only half British. And although I felt the coverage of labour and delivery was scanty and repetitive (there was no discussion of the third stage of delivery or perineal massage, much to my dismay), the information on breast-feeding was VERY helpful. This makes sense because our instructor - a middle-aged bourgeoise hippie who lay on the floor moaning in fake-labour pain at least once a class - is a lactation consultant.
Useful facts about breast-feeding:
- Newborn babies need to feed at least once every three hours. You shouldn't try to schedule the baby's feedings, except you should set an alarm to go off every three hours in the night so that if your baby doesn't wake on his or her own to feed you can wake them.
- After baby is done feeding on one breast you should always offer the other. Then start with that breast the next feeding.
- A baby doesn't need to feed for a certain amount of time. But if your baby is at your breast for 45- 1 hour, he probably isn't latched properly. When babies don't latch properly they don't get as much milk, and your boobs get unnecessarily sore.
- Your nipples shouldn't hurt when baby is breast-feeding. If they do, he isn't latched on properly.
- Baby's head should always be tilted BACK when feeding. (Do this now. Put your chin to your chest and try to open your mouth and swallow. Go ahead, do it! How does that feel?)
- Don't support baby's head when feeding either, just hold them very snug and firm against your body.
- It is really important that baby's first experience with feeding be positive. Right after birth, let them lay against your chest and find your nipple on their own - don't force them on or let a midwife/nurse force them on. We watched a video of a newborn lying on his mom's chest immediately after birth and he just instinctively crawled his little head towards her nipple - it is amazing!
- If feeding your newborn every two hours (or more) seems excessive, think of it this way.... When was the last time you put anything in your mouth today? Even a sip of water? Because breast-milk is baby's everything... and with a stomach the size of a walnut in the first weeks, it makes sense they get hungry and thirsty at least every two hours!
- Crying is a last resort for hunger. Look for rooting with the mouth, putting hands in mouth, general restlessness - and try to feed before he cries.
- The WHO and all other major health groups recommend exclusive breast-feeding (no formula!) for 6 months. Only 1-2% of British women do this.
- Frequent feeding through the night is really important for establishing a good milk supply so that you can successfully feed for those six months (and beyond.)
- At six months, solids can start to be introduced but you should still be breast-feeding too.
I feel very lucky to be able to be unemployed through the first year of little boy's life. I don't know how I would cope with leaving him after 3 months' (or even 6 months!) maternity leave. I also don't know how I could possibly exclusively breast-feed if I had to go back to work after 3 months! I don't think it's possible, unless you pump and store your milk every couple of hours while at work. My mom swears she exclusively breast feed me when she started going back to work when I was 3 months old, but then I asked her, well didn't you supplement with formula? and she said she couldn't really remember. She didn't pump at work, but would run home during her lunch break to feed me, and then would race home every evening early. Sounds too hard! I'm so lucky, this I know.
Useful facts about breast-feeding:
- Newborn babies need to feed at least once every three hours. You shouldn't try to schedule the baby's feedings, except you should set an alarm to go off every three hours in the night so that if your baby doesn't wake on his or her own to feed you can wake them.
- After baby is done feeding on one breast you should always offer the other. Then start with that breast the next feeding.
- A baby doesn't need to feed for a certain amount of time. But if your baby is at your breast for 45- 1 hour, he probably isn't latched properly. When babies don't latch properly they don't get as much milk, and your boobs get unnecessarily sore.
- Your nipples shouldn't hurt when baby is breast-feeding. If they do, he isn't latched on properly.
- Baby's head should always be tilted BACK when feeding. (Do this now. Put your chin to your chest and try to open your mouth and swallow. Go ahead, do it! How does that feel?)
- Don't support baby's head when feeding either, just hold them very snug and firm against your body.
- It is really important that baby's first experience with feeding be positive. Right after birth, let them lay against your chest and find your nipple on their own - don't force them on or let a midwife/nurse force them on. We watched a video of a newborn lying on his mom's chest immediately after birth and he just instinctively crawled his little head towards her nipple - it is amazing!
- If feeding your newborn every two hours (or more) seems excessive, think of it this way.... When was the last time you put anything in your mouth today? Even a sip of water? Because breast-milk is baby's everything... and with a stomach the size of a walnut in the first weeks, it makes sense they get hungry and thirsty at least every two hours!
- Crying is a last resort for hunger. Look for rooting with the mouth, putting hands in mouth, general restlessness - and try to feed before he cries.
- The WHO and all other major health groups recommend exclusive breast-feeding (no formula!) for 6 months. Only 1-2% of British women do this.
- Frequent feeding through the night is really important for establishing a good milk supply so that you can successfully feed for those six months (and beyond.)
- At six months, solids can start to be introduced but you should still be breast-feeding too.
I feel very lucky to be able to be unemployed through the first year of little boy's life. I don't know how I would cope with leaving him after 3 months' (or even 6 months!) maternity leave. I also don't know how I could possibly exclusively breast-feed if I had to go back to work after 3 months! I don't think it's possible, unless you pump and store your milk every couple of hours while at work. My mom swears she exclusively breast feed me when she started going back to work when I was 3 months old, but then I asked her, well didn't you supplement with formula? and she said she couldn't really remember. She didn't pump at work, but would run home during her lunch break to feed me, and then would race home every evening early. Sounds too hard! I'm so lucky, this I know.
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